Several months ago, I was asked out by one of my co-workers. “Jaime, are you interested in tutoring a Chinese man in Oral English?”
Not one to say ‘no,’ I replied with an enthusiastic “yes, sure!”
Enter the Chinese Policeman - a beefy, bulky, hulk of a guy standing a tall 5 foot 8 inches, decked out in his fashionable designer jeans and polo shirt. In truth, I think his arms - larger than my thick Hamilton calves and much more muscular - were actually tearing out of the armholes. Built, hard as a rock - this guy was probably born in a gym.
We arranged to have dinner at a nice tea house - nice being in no way the proper adjective to use in this situation. The place was beautiful, with a coy pond in the center of the restaurant…and what’s more, this place is vegetarian which surprised me to no end.
After a few hours of awkward Chinglish conversation with my poor co-worker translating from Chinese to English and back again, we head back to my apartment. It was about midnight and I had a full day of classes the next morning. Imagine my surprise when I noticed that the gate to my apartment was closed, locked, sealed to keep out the night owls like myself.
Understand that I was still getting used to my surroundings…this was September after all and I had no clue at this time that just around the corner was another entrance. So, what do you think happened?
In front of my two new Chinese friends and the shop owner we’d asked for an explanation, I climbed up the seven foot fence, harkening back to my tree climbing days. I heard someone suck in a breath as I did the unimaginable - hefting my body over the fence and jumping down to the ground, I wiped off my hands and turned around. My two Chinese friends were aghast. No Chinese woman would willingly do that I suppose. In truth I think they were embarrassed that I so recklessly and carelessly climbed the fence. And, in double truth, I, too was incredibly embarrassed…what if I’d been wearing a skirt? My then tight fitting jeans?
One more thing to add to my resume: Professional Chinese Fence Hopper